I think that I have three problems: #1 – I cannot build up enough energy to go out and meet women. I am not shy in normal social situations, but just going up to a woman and talking to her is not a skill of mine. I am much more comfortable not expressing intimacy to anyone. I would consider myself over 10 years “behind the curve” and I really feel like a loser. I tend to be a “glass is half empty” type of person.If I go out with someone my own age, I am going to be light-years behind in experience. When you say that you are a nice guy, I wonder if what you mean is that you are a passive guy. I note that you’ve been on dates but have bailed out of the process after the second date, perhaps because you “fear intimacy” as it were (the second date being the beginning of the period when the formation of a relationship becomes a possibility).It has quite often been acceptable for a male to be the older person in a relationship.Some issues can arise if the opposite happens; a younger man and an older woman.
Woman B: I was 23 when we started dating and he was 39. We got back in contact and I realized how much I missed having him in my life. Woman A: Looking back, I think he needed a partner who would tolerate his bullshit if he was to be in a relationship at all. Woman A: The longest lasting of these relationships started when I was 18 and he was 40. However, we didn't start dating until I was 18 and he was 36. They split up around 2009 and I didn't hear from him for 18 months. Do you think your age was part of the attraction for him? Woman B: Twenty-seven and he recently turned 42 (we're still together). We discovered we had a lot of interests in common and became good friends. Most of the men I dated more casually at the time were in their 30s. It also made me feel special — this man seemed so much more worldly than the men my age, and the fact that he was interested in me seemed too good to be true. Woman D: Originally I think I was flattered that somebody who had experienced so much of life was interested in me.In addition, there can be some issues as well, if the male is many years older than the female.It is possible to have a secure and loving relationship in which there is an age difference, if both people involved understand certain issues that may arise and they can work together to resolve them.